Aug 6, 2009

reliving the lost days

My trip was cancelled, so I have to take the first one tomorrow with mama. The day looked as if it was promising me tedium, so I messaged my best friend right away to inform her of my extended stay and to hang out with her as well --- something we have not done in ages.

The Fhang Festival

I finally met up with Loida and gained a new friend, Jojo, also a nurse at ODH. This afternoon, we had frappuccino, double chocolate chip cake and black forest cake. Then ate early dinner --- sizzling treats --- at Dadaz and finally ended the night ordering siomai with rice + cola. I couldn’t complain about our resto and food choices, as they were all surprisingly good. Believe me or not, even if I’ve lived half my life in this humble city, I truly haven’t gone to the places where the locals usually go out to chill. The only redeeming thing about the food fest is the pitcher of strawberry margarita the three of us shared. It was good too! This was also another surprise. Kudos to my friend Jecjec and her husband Junjun, for Dadaz’ yummy grub and heavenly cocktail mixes. It’s a relief to have a calorie-burner amidst what seems to be a prisoner’s last meal. Hehe! But what the heck, we don’t get to eat like that every day, especially with each other. After the amusing ordeal, my tummy felt quite sick. Indeed it proved it was when I arrived home, only a bit though.

A Hangdog Revelation

From my senior year in high school up until I was a freshie in college, I had this titanic crush on a schoolmate I haven’t even spoken to. Then, I was not even sure if he knew of my blatant existence. All I knew of was the unexplainable heart-racing and pounding whenever I’d see him. In college though, we went to different schools and only saw each other once. But even at that, I still fostered the same irrational feeling of admiration for him. It’s pathetic, I know. But it’s the whole truth of the story. Ever since that one meeting and until now, our paths have never crossed.

Lately, an unexpected occurrence had our “fate” intertwine again, indirectly though. Lo and behold, he knows me. He and Loida talked shortly about me sometime two months ago. She even told him of those colossal, unabashed emotions I had for him, on my cue of course.

Fast forward to dinner a while ago. When Jojo found out about him, he laughed so hard and even jabbed a big question mark in the air to ask me the shortest but hardest question, “Why?” of course I couldn’t come up of a good enough rational explanation, let alone a simple answer to the question. Jojo was quizzing me about what possible trait I saw in him that lead to the major crush, all I could say was, “I don’t know.” For someone who hasn’t had a chance of speaking to “J”, Jojo would want to assume I was attracted physically. But no, he couldn’t bring himself to believe that because “J” isn’t really that much of a good-looking guy. When Jojo asked me how I saw “J” on the outside, I said, “Well, he’s a bit cute.” Jojo couldn’t believe what I had said. To verify things, we opened a person’s cyberspace account and from there, looked at the several photos of “J”. Indeed, Jojo wasn’t wrong about his incredulity.

What’s The Lesson?

Mine was a case of blind attraction. Not in the sense that I refuse to see the person’s vileness because of the strong admiration I have for him. But blind, in every literal sense of the word --- I didn’t even know why I had a big crush on him from the start. And imagine, it lasted for two years. Maybe it was a rare case of the clich├ęd saying, “To each his/her own”.

The morale of the story: irrational things, and feelings, have the strong ability to wash your proper judgment; be cautious all the time and never let it hit that high note in you --- learn to control and see things from a different perspective.

Moreover …

What do you exactly do when someone who truly annoys you writes on your wall? I know I have my human frailties with me even if I try hard to be a good person, but what if you just can’t stand this person’s presence, what would you do? People know I am transparent and I have poor theatrics, so to avoid is my better option. But would that be good?

This is fairly a common dilemma we all face. Not all have the audacity to pull a face and pretend. Some sham genuineness until they reach true sincerity. But for someone like me, the best move is to be just civil and polite. No more, no less. I think that would be enough. If the person continues to pester further, wave a stick and whack him/her away, hehe!